8 Things Boomers & Gen X Call Selfish That Gen Z Sees As Normal Behavior
PintoArt | ShutterstockBoomers and Gen X think Gen Z is lazy and selfish. Gen Z thinks boomers and Gen X are stuffy and out of touch. That's mostly because of what each cohort lived through during their formative years.
Many of the things older generations perceive as pillars of respect are now being challenged by Gen Zers rejecting the corporate hustle and speaking openly about mental health. They clearly have different values and priorities, which is why so much of Gen Z’s behavior comes across as selfish to Gen X and boomers.
Boomers and Gen X think these normal Gen Z behaviors are selfish:
1. Job-hopping regularly
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Gen Zers value work-life balance, flexibility, and meaning in their work, in direct contrast to the company loyalty and grit of their older co-workers. They job-hop more frequently because they’re building experience and looking for a culture that suits their lifestyle, rather than shapeshifting into someone they’re not.
To corporate employees who’ve dedicated their lives and reputations to a single company, of course, young workers demanding change and leaving after a few years comes across as selfish. However, their generational differences aren’t meant to spite their counterparts but rather result from their different values and priorities.
2. Having clear boundaries between work and home
Gen Zers value their personal time, and while those who find meaning and purpose in work may shift those priorities slightly, most of the time, they have strict boundaries. Whether it’s turning off a work phone and email after working hours or refusing to work on weekends, they’re much less lenient than older generations when it comes to proving their commitment to a role.
Boomers and Gen Xers, with different perceptions of loyalty, often see these boundaries as rude or selfish, which is why there are so many myths and misconceptions about Gen Zers in the corporate world.
3. Not going to family gatherings and holidays
Family connections and bonds play an important role in shaping happiness for Gen Z. However, that doesn’t mean they’re willing to tolerate toxic family dynamics for the sake of tradition. For the same reasons why they’re not keeping family heirlooms, they’re skipping family gatherings to protect their peace.
Older generations are well-known for their strong family values. No matter what happens, they’re loyal and committed to showing up for their relatives. Gen Z would rather skip out on holidays with extended family than deal with a relative they know will make their experience unpleasant.
4. Choosing not to settle down
Many Gen Zers are delaying having children and settling down due to financial constraints. Others are choosing to stray from tradition just because they want to. They don’t feel pressured to have children, especially in today's world, because they’re not afraid to push back and challenge the status quo.
However, to Gen Xers and boomers who might want grandchildren or feel pressure to protect the traditional family structure, these personal life decisions can feel like an attack. They’ve been taught that these adult milestones are pivotal to success, and when all they want is for their kids to be secure and happy, of course, they’re afraid of this change in priorities.
As they get older, Gen Zers understand that you don’t have to get married or have kids to be happy. Especially for women, the true path to happiness might actually be focusing on yourself, and that’s not selfish.
5. Going ‘no contact’ with parents
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Going no contact with parents and family members has become a much more popular choice in recent years. Of course, there are situations where hard conversations and resolving conflict will always be better than completely cutting a parent off, but in many circumstances, it's necessary to maintain good mental health.
Just because someone is your family doesn’t mean you have to tolerate being treated poorly. Young people today are more open about their mental health and well-being. The relationships they choose to invest in look very different from those of their parents and grandparents, who grew up with all kinds of rigid stigmas.
6. Setting boundaries and creating space
In their family relationships, conversations about mental health are creating a lot of tension between Gen Zers and their Gen X or boomer parents. However, they’re also being criticized for having stronger boundaries at work and in their professional lives.
They’re not afraid to express their needs and speak openly about mental health, often in ways that make older generations uncomfortable. However, protecting your peace and learning to set boundaries are important parts of wellness, especially for young people today. It’s not selfish to create a boundary and avoid burnout.
7. Saying ‘no’ to extra obligations at work
Instead of working themselves to the brink of burnout, as many older generations did as a strange badge of honor, Gen Zers are saying “no” at work. It might come across as selfish to leaders and companies who profit off the exhaustion of their employees, but for Gen Z, it’s a wellness habit.
They’re not loyal to companies that don’t care about their best interests, so why would they burn themselves out, cut into their personal time, and take on work they’re not being paid for? Especially when they’re also not interested in climbing the corporate ladder with a single company, it’s no shock that they’re not looking to impress people at the expense of health.
8. Using sick time to take a mental health day
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Many older generations purposefully don’t use their PTO or sick time, because they perceive grit as an admirable trait. They wear their work-related exhaustion as a badge of honor.
However, Gen Zers are taking a much different approach to their work-life balance. Not only are they setting more boundaries in the office, but they’re actually using their time off. They’re even using sick time for mental health days when they need a break, and, unsurprisingly, they’re better off because of it.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
