The Most Likable Person In The Room Is Almost Always Doing 4 Specific Things
4 PM production | ShutterstockWe all want to be liked, but some people appear better at it than others. It can be frustrating when you see your friends become a magnet and attract people they just met, but that doesn't mean you can't change your approach. The most likable person in any room stands out for a reason, after all.
It's important to remember that you shouldn't compare yourself to people who seem to be the life of the party, because they might be trying extremely hard to appear that way. It isn't just about their personality, but about habits that make them more enjoyable to be around.
The most likable person in the room is almost always doing 4 specific things
1. Listening more than they talk
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We all want to feel seen and heart. Everyone's lives get busy, and it can be hard for our friends to find time to look after us since they're likely busy taking care of themselves. So, when someone else outside of our friend group listens intently to us, it makes us feel deeply understood.
The most likable people in the room help others feel like they aren't just part of a big group of people. When they listen without speaking, it validates our experiences. It's no wonder everyone around them finds them magnetic.
If you spend all your time talking, you make others think you aren't really listening. You portray yourself as selfish and domineering, rather than letting others guide the conversation.
2. Staying authentic
If you think someone is fake, whether it's a friend or an acquaintance, you're likely unable to trust them. You might worry they're talking about you behind your back or are not really who they pretend to be. But since trust is the foundation of any good relationship, being likable means staying authentic, earning trust by being vulnerable and genuine.
People don't typically like to talk about their negative traits. Some worry that if they do, it will turn others away, so they hide those negative qualities. Authentic people, however, share the things they feel insecure about because they know it's a part of who they are.
Being vulnerable shows others that they're not being fake and that they're relatable. Having somebody be honest and open about their insecurities helps other people feel secure just being near them.
3. Laughing at themselves
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An easy way to become unlikable is by being defensive when others critique you. This is particularly frustrating if they overreact to comments that were casual and didn't seem rude. While some people yell or cut off someone poking fun, likable individuals know the power of laughing at themselves.
People want to be around someone who can laugh at themselves. When someone is able to do this, others feel more comfortable speaking. They don't need to watch their words around them the same way they do around friends who respond poorly to criticism.
Along with making others feel comfortable, they're incredibly magnetic. The confidence someone shows by being able to laugh at themselves lets others see them as more appealing, and someone they want to get to know better.
4. Giving genuine compliments
Everyone is insecure about something. Even if there's not a particular thing that makes them feel this way, they may still hold the belief that they aren't good enough. But likable people know how to get people out of that rut by giving compliments that are real and genuine. And just a few kind words like that can make anyone feel better about themselves.
A compliment can help people feel more confident, especially when it's about something very specific. Likable people make a compliment feel unique to the person they're speaking to, not just generic. These compliments let people feel seen, like someone is paying enough attention to see the small things.
Giving specific compliments can make people want to be around you more. They aren't just giving you confidence, they're also proving how caring and engaging they are.
Lily Bell is a college student studying English and Publications who covers relationships, mental health, and personal narratives surrounding the human experience.

