8 Phrases People Say When They Are Slowly Losing Their Ability To Trust Anyone

Losing trust can harm our relationships and make it more difficult to trust others.

While avoiding connection and remaining skeptical might feel like the best way to protect ourselves, without trust we live in an uncertain and anxious reality. Later in life, trust is especially important. But for people slowly losing their ability to trust anyone, you might spot them by the phrases they often use.

Phrases people who are losing their ability to trust anyone often say

1. 'I'll figure it out'

woman with trust issues telling colleague I'll figure it out Kinga | Shutterstock

Many hyper-independent people who struggle to trust because of childhood trauma or neglectful parents early in life often refuse help as a protective mechanism. They'd prefer to suffer in silence and struggle behind closed doors, rather than admit they can't do something on their own and have someone else to step in.

You'll often hear things like "I'll figure it out" or "I don't need your help," usually in a defensive tone. To them, being offered kindness and compassion can sometimes feel like a personal attack on their autonomy.

2. 'What do you mean by that?'

Many people losing their ability to trust are naturally hypervigilant. They're skeptical of people's intentions and constantly second-guess them.

This often stems from external factors and worries, but it's just as common for someone with self-doubt to be doubtful of others because of their own insecurities. They don't trust their own ability to choose people and open up in the right moments, which is part of why their self-doubt leads to low self-esteem.

3. 'I know they wouldn't care'

Instead of leading with optimism to protect against mental health struggles and disconnection, people who have a hard time with trust can't help but live as a pessimist. They question everything and assume the worst in people. They always focus on what could go wrong instead of what's going right.

They don't trust anyone, because they automatically assume they have poor intentions or are out to get them. Why would you trust people that you actively think the worst of?

4. 'I'll be okay on my own'

For someone who finds it hard to trust others and lean into healthy commitment out of fear, it's not uncommon for them to self-isolate as a coping mechanism. When someone gets too close or they start relying on someone's presence, they isolate to protect themselves from getting hurt.

They've learned that they can't rely on anyone and have to be alone to have full control, whether it's self-esteem issues or childhood trauma from parents they couldn't count on.

5. 'That doesn't make sense'

woman saying that doesn't make sense to friend she doesn't trust Anatoliy Karlyuk | Shutterstock

On top of second-guessing themselves and letting that self-doubt influence trust, people struggling with vulnerability may also subconsciously question everyone else. They pick apart stories and read into passing comments, using phrases like "that doesn't make sense" to convey their distrust.

While these assumptions may disconnect them from other people and spark resentment, for a hyper-independent person, that's just one less reason to worry about being vulnerable.

6. 'Yeah right, like I believe that'

When people truly trust each other, that understanding reduces the risk of conflict from sarcasm. We can trust that someone's intentions are good and simply appreciate the humor of sarcasm, without having to read into what they said.

But someone with little trust in others often uses sarcasm to express their discontent. It's passive-aggressive and sometimes condescending. It's because they don't trust anyone, but don't have the inner security to have a truly vulnerable conversation about their concerns.

7. 'I'm not talking about that right now'

Losing trust in everyone usually stems from personal issues, rather than a specific mistake that now serves as evidence to create space. It's a fear of vulnerability or a sense of inner turmoil.

People like this don't trust others because they're uncomfortable opening up, in general. That's where avoidance comes in.

It's a classic means of coping with a fear of vulnerability or commitment. And while it might feel comforting and relieving to avoid in the moment, in the long run it only creates more tension and anxiety.

8. 'I've been busy'

woman losing trust telling friend on the phone I've been busy MAYA LAB | Shutterstock

Despite having a clear motive for disconnecting from relationships and isolating themselves, someone with trust issues probably isn't going to come right out and say "I don't trust you." Instead, they'll have every excuse for their absence to avoid the discomfort of a vulnerable situation.

"I've been busy" or "I've got a lot on my plate" are obvious, especially coupled with other signs of lacking trust like second-guessing and skepticism.

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.

People Who Are Slowly Losing Their Ability To Trust Anyone Usually Say 8 Phrases In Casual Conversation