People With Big Brains & Zero Back-Bone Usually Make 8 Weak Excuses For Themselves
SeventyFour | Shutterstock Just because someone is smart doesn't mean they make the best decisions or have a strong sense of who they are. Rather than pushing back when someone is trying to take advantage of them or behaving unethically, highly intelligent people may freeze up trying to consider the best course of action.
When someone has a big brain but a weak backbone, they get stuck in "analysis praralysis" and end up doing nothing. The more they avoid taking accountability, the worse it becomes. That's when you start hearing things like this.
Excuses people with big brains and zero backbone make for themselves
1. 'I'm just not ready yet'
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Smart people can sometimes feel frozen with indecision. They have the knowledge to make informed decisions, but the more they learn, the more unsure they feel. As experts at Michigan State University explain, "The more knowledge you gain in a subject, the more you understand the complexity and nuance of the topic." That's probably why smart people with no backbone say, "I'm just not ready yet."
In order to overcome this, they need to recognize how their intelligence may be holding them back. They don't want to take that risk and look like a fool. So, even if it's silly, they'd rather sit and wait. It's semi-cowardly, but smart people don't know how to get out of their heads.
2. 'I don't want to make things awkward'
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People with big brains may have weak backbones due to never wanting to make matters worse when there's already a problem. Because they're concerned about how their actions affect others, they tread carefully, analyzing every possible outcome until they begin to drive themselves insane.
Is their concern valid? Absolutely. It's not heroic to needlessly make things awkward or make someone uncomfortable and sometimes, speaking too much can make matters worse. However, silence is equally unhealthy in some situations. That's why it's important to wait until things have cooled down before voicing your opinion. It might not be received well at first, but they'll eventually come around.
3. 'I'm probably overthinking it'
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It may come as a surprise, but highly intelligent people often have some shame over their intelligence. Maybe they were called names as kids or told they were know-it-alls. People probably told them they were over-thinking things enough that now they default to saying this so people won't judge them.
This isn't the worst idea, as misunderstandings can harm relationships (especially romantic ones!), so it's important to clarify. However, saying this too often can make a person look weak or insecure when, in realitly, they may have a very strong position that they've thought about exactly the right amount.
4. 'I can figure it out later'
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Smart people leave their worries for their future selves. The last thing they want is to grapple with another issue, especially if they're already stressed. That's probably why they make they look so weak when they say they'll deal with something later.
They'd rather push away their problems than deal with them head-on. Call them cowardly, but it's the only way they've learned how to survive this long. So, if you expect them to be proactive, you're mistaken. Smart people with no backbone always wait until the last second.
5. 'I'll wait and see'
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People with no backbone are always waiting for the perfect opportunity, but usually that opportunity never becomes perfect enough to actually take action. Even if it's cowardly, they'd rather be 100% certain than lose face. But the problem is that nothing is ever 100% certain.
Sometimes being smart means waiting too long for certainty. You've got to just go for it, sometimes. As terrifying as it is, taking risks is worth it. It creates opportunity and room for progress. That's why people need to push their fears aside and continue stepping forward. Even if they fail, they are continuously learning.
6. 'I'm sure it'll work itself out'
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Smart people can't always depend on luck. Problems might work themselves out, but there's no guarantee things will go their way. That's why saying, "I'm sure it'll work itself out," is such a flimsy excuse. It might work in movies, but not in the real world. In real life, we gotta be able to take the reins.
Unfortunately, smart people with no backbone struggle to find the courage. Instead of taking action, they leave it to fate. They know it's problematic, but at this point, they couldn't care less. If it means dodging accountability, they're game.
7. 'I don't want to rush anything'
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The last thing they want is to make a mistake, and that's why they wisely say, "I don't want to rush things." In the moment, they think they're being rational, and they are. Taking a moment to think things through is the wisest decision, right?
While it's good to pause for a second, this doesn't mean taking three business weeks to decide. And when you're really smart, it's easy to take way too long.
At the end of the day, you can't avoid the inevitable. You gotta move forward in one direction. That's why smart people should learn how to be specific, otherwise, it looks cowardly.
8. 'It's better to play it safe'
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Is it better to play it safe? Sometimes. At work, it could be better to hold one's tongue than to speak out of turn. But just because it's fine in one instance doesn't mean it's fine in another. Especially in relationships, sometimes it's better to be more forthcoming.
As Greater Good in Education said, "Because when we are honest, we are more likely to trust each other — and this trust develops positive, healthy relationships and a sense of belonging." Unfortunately, people with no backbone are too scared to be upfront. That's probably why their relationships are such a bust.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
