People Who Are Mental & Emotional Manipulators Usually Say 10 Phrases In Casual Conversation
Bits And Splits | ShutterstockTrue mental and emotional manipulators aren't easy to spot. Even though they often appear likeable and easygoing, they tend to expose themselves with the language they use in everyday conversation.
Because their behavior doesn't look threatening on the surface, it's easy to miss the glaring red flags. Manipulative people may be smooth, but they aren't invincible. This is why it's important to pay close attention to their words.
Mental and emotional manipulators often say these phrases in casual conversation:
1. 'You're way too sensitive'
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Most manipulators find it hard to see anything outside of their own perspective. They're self-absorbed to the core. Since they're almost always looking for a way to justify their toxic behavior, it's no surprise that their go-to phrase is, "You're way too sensitive."
Instead of taking accountability, manipulative people are quick to turn the tables on others, who they hope will "begin to distrust their own emotional signals, psychologist Mark Travers, Ph.D., explained.
2. 'Take a joke'
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Manipulators are vicious by nature. They're quick to humiliate others, so it's no surprise that a common phrase they use is, "take a joke."
As Travers explained, this is a "form of hidden hostility." Not to mention that, while manipulators are great at criticizing others, they can barely handle criticism themselves.
3. 'You're overthinking it again'
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Manipulators are top-notch gaslighters. They're masters at making you question your reality by saying, "You're overthinking it again."
Their mind games may leave you reeling, but never be afraid to walk away. It's hard, but over time, this kind of manipulation can erode your self-esteem. That's why it's important to distance yourself from these types of people. You may want to give them the benefit of the doubt, but it shouldn't come at the cost of your sanity.
4. 'Everyone else agrees with me'
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Manipulators often try to destroy your confidence by making you think everyone agrees with them, not you. Which most likely isn't even true.
This is why it's important not to let this phrase get to you. Manipulative people use this phrase to make your people-pleasing tendencies go haywire, but really, they are just exaggerating.
5. 'It's fine, I'm used to it'
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Most people who are manipulators need you to feel sorry for them. As professional counselor Jamie Cannon, MS, LPC, explained, they "are experts at understanding, and using, others’ emotions to get what they want."
Throwing around the phrase, "It's fine, I'm used to it," gets you to feel bad for them, which feeds their ego. This is why it's important to take a step back. Rather than lead with your emotions, ask yourself, "What does this person get from all this?"
6. 'I was just trying to help'
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If there's one thing manipulators love, it's spinning a story. They'd much rather say, "I was just trying to help," than admit how badly they messed up. In their eyes, their quote-unquote good intentions mean being absolved of their wrongdoings.
Clinging to the belief that they're morally justified helps them feel superior. This is why manipulators deflect and deflect. Whether or not they realize it in the moment, it's just another way they've learned to cope with their dwindling insecurity.
7. 'You never listen to me'
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Manipulators really know how to spin a story. That's why they'll often say, "You never listen to me," and genuinely mean it. In their mind, if you aren't obeying them, then you aren't listening to them.
Yes, they're that entitled. They believe the world should always work in their favor. Unfortunately for them, that just can't be the case.
8. 'Go ahead, see if I care'
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There's no winning with a manipulator. It doesn't matter how much you try to meet them halfway. When they sense they're not about to get their way, they often say, "Go ahead, see if I care."
They use this phrase to make you feel guilty, which clinical psychologist Kia-Rai Prewitt, PhD, explained is "a form of emotionally manipulative behavior that appeals to your sense of responsibility or obligation to try to get you to act a certain way."
9. 'It's all in your head'
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A mentally and emotionally manipulative person doesn't stop the gaslighting at calling you sensitive. Another go-to phrase they love to use is, "It's all in your head."
The worst part of it all is that, "Even when you know they are not telling the truth, they can be very convincing," life coach Sherri Gordon wrote. "In the end, you start to second-guess yourself," which is exactly what they want.
10. 'Why am I always the bad guy?'
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True manipulators don't care about the error of their ways. They'd much rather stomp their feet and play the victim because it feels easier to deflect than take accountability.
This is why you'll often hear a manipulative person ask why they're always made out to be the bad guy. Well, it's simple. It's because they deflect and deflect, destroying their relationships in the long run.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and trending topics.
