People Who Enjoy Life Most Choose These 4 Hard Things Over The Easy Option
halfpoint | CanvaI learned over the years not to depend on external events for my happiness. It’s easy to get caught up in the idea that life needs to be validating or interesting or stimulating enough for me to enjoy myself. Thinking this can stress us because we’re at the mercy of things going right, which they often do not.
So how do we ensure we live well and enjoy life? We focus on repeating actions that reflect our own choice to live life well, regardless of the situation, and regardless of how hard said actions are. It will always be easier to take the shortcut, but remember: We create our reality. We don’t wait for it, and when you refuse to wait for your own joy, it's not always the easiest path.
People who enjoy life most usually choose to do these hard things over the easy option:
1. They don't wait to feel good before doing stuff
Too many of us value our feelings as an indicator of what’s worth doing. You don’t need to feel good to act. You must act regardless of the flatness, the fear, or the frustration. Everything changes when you design a life biased to leaning in and doing things. The clinical name for this is "behavioral activation, but clinical psychologist, Dr. Rubin Khoddam, explains it simply: "Motivation does not precede action. Action precedes motivation."
The people who enjoy life the most become doers overnight. As for you: Take it up a notch and do more. Now we’re cooking. The momentum will fuel you. Sparks fly. Don’t question it. Just do it. Begin to enjoy a life in motion. You'll feel better, and more will happen in your favor.
2. People who enjoy life most continually prune their lives
Getty Images / Unsplash+
Most of us take on too much, and we know it. We accept too many engagements. We buy too much junk that we never use. We take on too many projects that send us spinning. Good pruners manage beautiful gardens. So, prune your life every day. Take stock of one area of your life and identify one thing you can subtract.
What item in your house no longer sparks joy that you barely use? Get rid of it (this doesn’t include an unruly child). The same applies to your business engagements, relationships, and bad habits. Find one thing that gets the chop. Life is about continual simplification, not taking on more than necessary. You’ll be far less stressed and more effective this way.
3. They learn how to enjoy simpler forms of entertainment
We all know that being glued to TikTok and video games isn’t doing us much good. Being continually flooded with dopamine from artificial and cheap sources is literally screwing with our heads.
In her book Dopamine Nation, Stanford psychiatrist Anna Lembke used the following analogy: "Just as the hypodermic needle is the delivery mechanism for drugs like heroin, the smartphone is the modern-day hypodermic needle, delivering digital dopamine for a wired generation."
These pitiful platforms are engineered to hook you in like a hapless puppy looking for bacon. Look to other sources of semi-passive entertainment like reading fiction, people-watching, doodling, sun-gazing, bird-watching, or just watching the ocean waves crash in. There is immense power here because, as our minds are still during these activities, we receive creative insights that nourish us.
4. People who enjoy life most ask life-improving questions
If we allow any old thought into our heads and stew on those concerns, we lose control. Take the power back by regularly asking soul-quenching questions that keep us on the right track: a creative and healthy track.
Ask questions like: "If I knew exactly how to solve my most pressing challenge, what one thing would I do to solve it today?" You may surprise yourself by how many solutions are already shelved away in that thick noggin of yours. Ask empowering questions. Ask questions that prompt a life of intrigue and enjoyment. You know the way to a life you will enjoy.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.
