If You Feel Like You Just Can’t Catch A Break, These 8 Reminders Are Worth Holding Onto
If You Feel Like You Just Can’t Catch A Break, These Reminders Are Worth Holding OntoYou've had a really downright awful week. Everything that could go wrong went wrong. Just like the saying goes, "When it rains, it pours."
That's how last week felt for me: My washer broke, my car got towed, my shower stopped draining water, I wasn't getting my paychecks, my roommate and I got stuck driving in the snow, and everyone just passed by without any sign of acknowledgement, and that's only the start of it. I know I'm not the only one who has had these weeks, because that's life.
As much as it felt like I couldn't catch a break (I almost felt like I was literally just waiting for the next thing to go wrong), it taught me a lot. Psychotherapist Leah Marone explained that our brains simply aren't built to operate at full throttle all day, and when stress keeps piling on without any room to breathe, the whole system stays locked in response mode; it's basically the worst.
Some seasons of life just feel relentlessly hard, and when you get stuck in one of those seasons, it's easy to start believing it's permanent or personal. But often, what you need most in those tough moments is a few steady reminders to help you reset your perspective.
If you feel like you just can’t catch a break, these 8 reminders are worth holding onto:
1. Notice who stays when things get hard
As I said, my car got towed. My day usually starts around 6 AM, and who wants to drive someone to work at that time? Apparently, most of my friends. I told them my car got towed, and I was actually shocked by how many of them told me I could take their cars or they could drive me where I needed to go.
Terry Gaspard, a clinical social worker, explained that the people who show up when things fall apart aren't just being nice; they're telling you everything you need to know about who actually values the relationship versus who's only around for the easy parts. That kind of support is rarer than it looks, so when you find it, hold onto it tight.
Even the old man who lives down the street told me I could knock on his door and he could bring me anywhere if I needed because he saw it happen. These people are special, and I appreciate them, so next time one of your friends is in a rough patch, help them because you never know when you might need the favor returned.
2. It's never as bad as it seems
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Of everything that happened to me, nothing was unfixable. I still have my health, a roof over my head, and food in my stomach; I am great. When life starts throwing negative things after negative things at you, you need to remember to keep a positive mindset.
Studies have shown that having a positive outlook is one of the strongest signs of resilience, helping people bounce back faster and d avoid the spiral of negative thinking that makes a bad week feel like a life sentence. This just means keeping the door open for things to turn around.
Even if it's "everything stinks, but I'm still happy." Be happy to be alive; you need to experience the lows sometimes to remember how lucky you are on a normal basis.
3. People won't feel sorry for you
You can throw yourself a pity party, but don't expect others to join in. Everyone might tell you what you're going through sucks, but no one else is experiencing it firsthand besides you. Everyone else has their own problems they are going through, and they don't have the time or energy to waste sympathizing with your life.
Everyone around you is carrying their own load, which means leaning too hard on others to carry yours can wear relationships down, according to marriage and family therapist Dr. Maxine Langdon Starr. Learning to process the hard stuff through your own resilience, rather than waiting for someone else to rescue you from it, is actually one of the most empowering things you can do.
4. Everything is temporary
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It's only temporary; everything in life is only temporary. It's just a bad day or a bad week, but it's not a bad life. I am extremely grateful for everything I have, and I will willingly admit that I am pretty dang lucky.
Despite the bad that might be going on, it doesn't mean you should doubt things. Things will turn around, and you will be okay.
Psychologist Dr. Sharon Saline stated that when we're stuck in the thick of a hard stretch, it's incredibly easy to lose sight of the fact that life is always moving forward. Noticing even the smallest signs that something is shifting, a problem that has resolved, a moment of ease, is exactly what helps the brain slowly loosen its grip on the idea that everything is going wrong at once.
5. Negativity begets negativity; positivity begets positivity
I can't stress this enough: Negativity breeds negativity. You know those people who always blame everyone else for their own misery? Or the people who think life owes them something?
It's because they can't get past the negative mindset. Once you lose a strong positive mindset, you let the toxic, negative one take over, which will never result in happiness.
Repetitive negative thinking is linked to higher rates of depression and anxiety, and has a self-reinforcing quality that makes it harder to break the longer it goes unchallenged, a 2019 study explained. The flip side is that the same mechanism works in the other direction, so actively redirecting your focus really does weaken the cycle over time, i.e. positivity begets positivity.
6. Spot the silver linings
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Didn't burn your toast? Awesome. Slept through the whole night? That's great! If you don't take a minute to appreciate the good things that are happening — even if it's just the little mundane things you never think about — you'll miss out on a lot of gratitude. If all you have in mind are all the bad things, that is all you'll notice, so make sure you appreciate the little things.
Grounding yourself in what's present and real, according to psychologist Dr. Elayne Daniels, is one of the most effective ways to still an anxious mind. When you're in a week where everything feels like it's going sideways, that intentional pause to notice what isn't wrong can change how your nervous system responds.
7. You never know what anyone else is going through
This week might be tough on you, but that doesn't mean it's only tough on you. There are more people than just you who are having a bad day or a bad week, so be kind to everyone. You never know what someone is going through.
And especially after going through your own week of personal struggle, you would hope everyone would be nice to you, right? So be kind to others. After all, it's no one's fault my washer broke, so there's no point in me taking it out on others.
A 2023 study found that small acts of warmth and kindness are associated with meaningful reductions in cortisol, the body's primary stress hormone. When you extend grace to someone else who's struggling, you end up releasing some of your own tension right along with it; isn't that a beautiful thing?
8. Never lose your sense of humor
Laughter actively suppresses stress hormones like epinephrine and cortisol while boosting dopamine and serotonin, research shows. It actually helps. Instead of being upset over things going wrong, just laugh it off.
Grab a glass of wine and laugh about it. Sure, it stinks now, but you'll make it through it, and everything will go back to normal. Redirect the anger you're feeling; I promise it will help you get through it more. So that glass of wine and a good laugh really isn't just comfort food for the soul; your brain chemistry is literally changing for the better.
Becca Martin is a writer with a background in marketing and journalism who specializes in love and relationship topics.
