People Who Always Feel Behind Financially Usually Believe These 6 Things Are A Given
Mix and Match Studio | ShutterstockWhen it comes to money and things like saving and investing, it's easy to feel like everyone else is doing the most while you are just floundering. The problem is that those comparisons are based on assumptions rather than reality.
Money has a strange way of making people feel like they're failing, even when they're doing everything they're supposed to do. Even with a stable job and savings in the bank, it's easy to still feel hopelessly behind the curve. That feeling is usually caused by a collection of beliefs about what adulthood is supposed to look like.
People who feel like they are playing catch-up when it comes to their finances often believe these things:
1. Everyone else has their finances figured out
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Social media has made financial comparison almost impossible to avoid. It's easy to look around and conclude that everyone else knows exactly what they're doing and is living lavish lifestyles. But most of the time this is a cultivated fantasy.
The person posting holiday photos may have spent months saving for that trip, if they personally paid for it at all. The new homeowner may have received help from family with the deposit. People who constantly feel behind assume they're the only ones who feel a bit clueless.
In reality, many people who appear financially comfortable are dealing with uncertainty or financial pressures that simply aren't visible. Comparing your entire financial reality to someone else's highlight reel almost always leads to unnecessary frustration. The truth is, you're comparing your everyday life to carefully chosen moments that rarely tell the whole story.
2. They should have reached certain milestones by now
Many people carry an invisible checklist for adulthood. By a certain age, they believe they should own a home and have retirement completely planned because they're earning an appropriate salary. The problem is that everyone is on their own timeline, shaped by their life experiences.
Different generations entered adulthood under different economic conditions. Someone who had to take out loans and pay their own way through college may reach financial milestones later. Someone who changed careers might temporarily earn less while building something better. All of it is subjective.
Feeling behind comes from comparing yourself to an imaginary ideal instead of your actual circumstances. Everyone's starting point is different, and so is the path they take. Progress that takes someone else five years might reasonably take you ten, and that doesn't mean you've failed.
3. That one mistake has permanently ruined their future
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Financial mistakes can feel enormous. Who hasn't felt like they chose the wrong degree in college or ruined their credit score because of credit card debt? Sure, those are specific examples, but the point is, you will make a bad money decision at some point in your life. It doesn't determine success. Some of the richest people in the world have made terrible financial decisions, after all.
The difference is that they viewed those decisions as setbacks rather than permanent identities. A poor financial decision doesn't automatically eliminate the possibility of future success.
4. Earning more money will automatically solve every problem
Earning more can help with financial instability, but people always seem to forget that expectations grow alongside income.
A bigger salary might have you spending more money, leaving you in the exact same position you were before the raise. This doesn't mean earning won't improve quality of life. You just need to be taught what to do with the excess, rather than just spending more.
5. Asking for help means they've failed
Many people carry enormous shame around needing help. They feel embarrassed asking questions about money or payment plans and feel uncomfortable accepting temporary support from family. They assume financially successful people simply figured everything out on their own.
The reality is very different. Most people with a leg up financially have a whole lot of help from generational wealth or simply luck. You can't learn without asking for help, and most young people especially need that support in this economy.
6. There's a particular number that means you've made it and can relax
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Many people imagine a magical financial number in income or savings that will mean they can stop worrying. Instead of worrying about saving money, however, they will probably just start worrying about investing it correctly. Or any other number of worries that could come up.
People who constantly feel behind often postpone peace of mind because they are conditioned to stress. Learning to recognize progress along the way may provide more peace than endlessly chasing the next financial milestone. Celebrating small wins can help you appreciate how far you've come, and having a clear budget and understanding of how you spend and how you save is the first step.
MeShanda Deason is a writer with a BFA in Creative Writing from Stephen F. Austin State University and minors in Business Communication and Literature who covers storytelling, culture, identity, and human connection across editorial, journalism, and marketing spaces.
