People Who Catch Unfaithful Partners Early Usually Watch For 10 Signs
simona pilolla 2 | Shutterstock Getting cheated on is horrible, especially when you're blindsided by it. If you notice some changes in your partner's routine, it might be time to get a little suspicious.
People who catch unfaithful partners early casually watch for these signs:
1. They stop talking about their day
Is your partner's communication getting shorter by the day? If he's not forthcoming about his day and you feel that he is being short and brief about it, you may need to ask him to elaborate.
If you feel like there is something that they're not telling you, then you’re probably right.
2. Your physical intimacy declines rapidly
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Are your late-night encounters nonexistent? Is kissing and close contact becoming more sparse?
There can be several reasons for the lack of affection in your marriage. According to an article in the New York Times, the reasons can include depression, medication, stress, and yes, even cheating. If you initiate intimate contact and your partner pushes you away, something is going on with your relationship that is a cause for concern.
3. You almost never talk on the phone anymore
Are your routine phone calls no longer routine? Are you talking less on the phone? Is this happening more during or after work hours?
If the usual talk during lunch and then from home is not happening, find out why. Is it temporary or has this been going on for months now? What are the patterns? See if you can figure out why.
4. Late office hours
Your partner never had late office hours before but now, for the past few months, it’s more frequent and they're too busy to answer the phone. Yes, this is sometimes normal, but if it's happening without a good (and verified) reason why, trust your gut.
This goes double if they also doesn’t want you to contact the receptionist or the main office. Why has this recently changed? Even worse, you're being actively discouraged from stopping by your spouse's workplace, even though you used to do it somewhat regularly.
5. They're acting weird with thier cell phone
Is your spouse hiding their cell phone? Is there a new password on it that wasn’t there before? Is the ringer on silent and if they look at the phone do they sometimes walk away or find an excuse to take the call or reply to the text in another room?
Are text messages automatically deleted? If your spouse's behavior has changed regarding how and when they use the phone, then this could be a sign that something is going on, and it’s not involving you.
6. They spend way more nights out
Is your husband going out more than he has in the past? Is it more frequent?
Are these friends that you have never met or heard of before? Is he coming home late at night or not talking about how his night went? If your gut is telling you something is up then go with it, you’re probably right.
7. They're hiding the credit card bill or their bank statements
Is your spouse paying the credit card bill and not showing you what was charged? Are there more frequent ATM withdrawals than there have been in the past? If you don’t know where your spouse is spending money, then how do you know if they're telling the truth?
Financial infidelity is a big problem in marriages. Even if your partner isn't cheating romantically, there may be a spending or even gambling issue going on, which can be just as damaging.
8. They go out with friends more
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Is your partner going out with friends more than you? If your partner isn’t inviting you out and chooses to go out more often with friends than before, you should start to talk.
9. The connection between you has changed
Does your partner not ask you about your day anymore or what’s new with you?
When they comes home from work and start to do his own thing and ignore you, it makes you feel like you’re not there. There's a reason for this and you should start asking why.
10. They're dressing and grooming differently
Your partner has recently acquired a new wardrobe dressing up more often. They're also wearing a new cologne or perfume, and you know that you didn’t buy it for them.
Have they started putting more effort into the way they look, especially in a pattern? For example, when going to work or going out with new friends or while on a business trip?
Be mindful that one of these signs is not an absolute that your partner is cheating. However, if you start adding the signs up and you have a gut feeling that is telling you that something is going on, you need to address it. Regardless of what the problem is, it's crucial that you address it early.
Shelley Skas, LCPC, is a professional counselor who helps individuals and families using evidence-based therapy programs.
